things to do and things that happened..

haah.. who would have thought that preparation to uni can be this tiring.. from one thing to another.. and still.. until now.. im not fully ready yet.. okie.. let me tell you about things that have happened.. yesterday.. we went to my mother's former office to look for confirmation on the form.. and what a shock to find that most of my mom's ex colleague are no longer there.. most have either moved or retired.. hmm.. no more familiar face lor.. but still she can find her old friends there.. talked for hours.. duh, understandable.. then, we settle our job and start moving.. okie.. let me tell you.. previously, it rained.. so the road was rather slippery.. okie, back to the story.. while driving.. we saw one of the ost weird and kind situation happened right in front of us.. a taxi driver stops his vehicle and went out of the car just to help a small child to cross the road.. how nice of him.. he makes me think that there are still people who are that good and kind-hearted.. then, we continued our journey.. and we saw a bad accident.. let me just say.. both cars dont look like cars anymore.. and to our surprise.. we almost make a 2nd accident there.. luckily we stopped in time.. huhu.. talk about blood rush.. then, we almost get into another accident again.. in less than 5 mins.. say what!! then.. we drive to home.. with a dumbstruck look on everyone's face.. lol.. so, moral of the story.. sometimes.. good things are followed by bad things..

*lol*

start all over again..

hmm.. looks like im going back to Shah Alam.. to further my studies of course.. will spend the next 4 years there.. with a new bunch of people with addition of the old ones.. im okie with that.. i dont mind making new friends.. but still.. although im happy to go to a place i've known.. it is still sad to be separated from some of my closest friends.. the people who always listen to my problems.. discuss my work with and do things together.. especially eating out.. hmm.. i guess i have to learn how to cope with the separation.. i just wish the best of luck to everyone..

*mixed feelings*

What do you expect?

Have you ever heard stories where one person is unfaithful and he/she expects the partner to be faithful.. and worst.. controlling the partner.. check about the partners whereabout or what he/she is doing while being unfaithful at the same time.. better still, ask their partner about who are the girls/guys that recently appear in their life and tell their partner to get away from those people.. wow.. im amazed by this kind of people.. how can you expect something like that when you yourself are not doing it.. haha.. this kind of people make me laugh.. you want fidelity while being infidel.. what do you expect.. i bet the person they are seeing right now are also doing the same.. unless that person is hopelessly devoted to the person.. in that case it is your bad.. please.. if you really love a person.. love that person only.. don’t try to say that you loved him/her while keeping at least one more as what we call spare parts.. i believe in monogamy although i don’t resent polygamy.. it is just that it is so funny to see someone trying to teach someone else about loyalty while they have thrown away their loyalty a long time ago..

*puzzled*

Im scared of matrimony..

Seriously, im not in any authority to talk about this as i am still very young.. barely reach the second decade of my life.. but from what i’ve seen right now.. it makes me feel scared about marriage.. joining two different families into one big family.. seriously, it is scary.. and there will always be voices that may like and dislike the new family member.. and i don’t think i have the heart to let anyone go through something like that.. especially someone i love so much.. just because the new family member is not used to the new culture.. that person is considered snobbish.. not friendly.. doesn’t know how to be in a family.. did they all forget that not everyone’s upbringing is the same to one another.. some family may take great care of family values but some might not care about it at all.. some were thought how to mingle with others, while some not.. and people still can’t accept this.. hey.. each individual have their own right to be who they are.. it is sad to see these happening.. pity that bride or groom.. you are not only marrying the person you love.. but the family to.. and if you can’t adapt to the new family style.. you just plain dead.. some are born friendly and some need time to become close to others.. and family mostly hope that they got the born friendly person.. looking at my future.. i might end up with the” need time to be close” people..
Another reason is i don’t have good role model to follow in order to bring up my family.. all i see is men who dominate women and treat them not so nicely.. this happens in real life and also the mass media.. and people say that we learn from what we see.. i don’t want to be like that.. but i have a tendency to be one.. damn.. pity the person who’s marrying me.. seriously.. im scared of marriage because of that.. family acceptance and role model..

*scared*

Lovesick people make me sick..

Lovesick is a condition where you can find it in people who are madly in love.. but some goes beyond acceptable borders and just can stop talking about their so called soulmate.. and being a listener to those stories can be painful too.. they keep on going “you know my honey blah blah blah..” and the stories are just never ending.. heck about it.. you know what.. i don’t care.. yes, i do tell stories to my friends about my partner but only when i have problems with my partner.. not all the time.. the case right now is some lovesick people just want to tell stories about their loved ones and see our reaction.. what do they want?.. the look of envy in our eye?.. for some.. they might get it.. but not from me.. i just freakin don’t care seriously.. im sick of lovesick people.. it is ok for you guys to fall in love but can you guys keep the details to your personal keeping only?.. it’s fine to tell about your loved one once in a while but all the time?? That is beyond acceptable..

*sick*

*Love Bug- JoBro*

Rejected due to circumstances..

After the long wait.. the answer is finally revealed.. and it’s a no.. and im ok with it.. hehe.. weird right.. and it is because we could not face the distance that we might face later in life as im pursuing my studies in other state.. not in my hometown.. and when we are far away from each other, we tend to do something that could ruin our relationship.. so, *** chose not to pursue with the idea of being partners.. ok, at first i was disappointed.. but then again.. look on the bright side.. we are now certain of our feeling and we are going to cherish the moment that we have right now.. for now, we are dating but we are not an item.. we are more than friends but less than partners.. that’s the status.. haha.. love ya.. you will always be my comfort and i don’t have to worry about going out with others and hurt your feeling.. and the same goes to you..

*loving somebody*

Festivity catastrophe..

During festivities..we can never know what is going to happen next.. things might go smoothly as planned or mishap might happen and we are so not prepared for it.. well, in my case, the second scenario happened.. just when we were busy with my uncle’s wedding feast.. i was shocked at the glance of my ex at the feast.. what in the heck is +++ doing here?? Only later to find out that +++ is invited by my uncle himself.. they are friends.. say what!!.. i cant focus because of it ok.. everything goes wrong for me.. and seeing +++ with partner kills me inside.. i feel like attacking.. hey, i still love +++.. we separate because of principle collides with love.. haish.. hated it.. seeing +++ there without being able to do anything.. then, families.. when they gather means there are stories to tell.. and they cant be not so nice sometimes.. hmm.. i don’t want to talk or get involved in it.. let them be.. even when things involve me..

*moody*

Waiting for an answer..

I have known this person for so long.. Since I was still in secondary school.. We were once together as an item but for all the wrong reason.. I used *** to forget about my past relationship.. the person take me although *** is already in another relationship.. but it doesn’t last that long.. we end up in separate ways as I could not lie to my heart and *** partner.. so, we get on with our life.. then, things happened again in my life.. I seek for *** again to heal my broken heart.. again, the wrong reason.. we almost did something bad.. but it did not happen.. luckily.. after a while.. i said enough with this lying and end my relationship with *** again.. and get on with life.. then, being single and no one in my mind, i still seek for ***.. *** is my comfort.. *** is always there when i need ***.. every time i have problem, although *** cant help, *** will always be there.. and *** even sing to me one of the most loveliest song without i expecting any from *** and i think.. maybe *** is the one i’ve been looking for.. after much consideration and advice from a friend, i decided to try my luck with *** this time.. who knows.. third time is the luck.. i confessed everything to *** and say i truly love *** this time and won’t play *** feeling anymore.. *** was startled by my confession and ask me to give*** time to think about it.. so, i give *** what *** need and will never push ***.. it’s up to *** now.. can’t wait for Monday where all will be revealed..

*anxious*

*when you look me in the eyes- JoBro*
(written on friday)