okie, now i am still in the fasting month, by far i could say that i had not left any day of fasting since not eating is not a big problem for me, not shopping is a different case. i remembered back then, when i first enter university for my foundation program, i found no difficulty in managing money for food because i dont eat, once a day is enough. the money flow nowhere else but the garments retails shop of countless brands. i dont really care what is the brand as long as i like it.. okie, i think im going astray from the actual reason of writing.. i talking about lust here. this fasting month, with a lot things on sale for hari raya, curbing my lust would be a big problems. i could see signboards saying !SALE! as far as my eyes can see at the shopping mall.. and i need to shop real bad.. huhu.. i want new shoes, handbags, tshirts, pants and all because everything in my wardrobe is old and big i must say.. this is what happened when you lost a lot of weight suddenly..
then, from this lust also, i start to develop nasty thoughts. thought of how to get those stuff i want easily. when i say easily, i mean real easy.. if you know what i am saying.. hehe.. nastiness.. Sai, repent! huhu.. okie, but yeah, a lot of nasty thoughts visited me. and not being able to shop and eat make me think of particular someone even more than usual.. whatta?? i thought people say fasting curb your lust for love and you know what, but in my case, i experienced opposite effect. i am filling most of my think thinking about love. something i hardly do before. darn it, i need food to distract me, or the best distraction ever.. Shopping.. with no worries.. yeah, lust is a bad thing..