of something not supposed to be done..

sometimes in life.. we do something that we are not supposed to do.. we did this things just to satisfy our desires.. that is what i have done.. i have chatted online with someone that im not supposed to talk again.. my ex.. which i left due to my principle in life.. although knowing how wrong is the act.. but i just do it because i need to.. and what a relief after doing it.. we talk about what have been happening in our life post-breakup.. how we found new things in life.. and how we missed the olden days.. taking a glimpse at *** for that two hours melted my heart.. how i missed ***.. i realised how much i love ***.. but we shall never be together.. because ** is married.. i want *** badly but i will never wreck someone mariage to please my desires.. so, i let *** be.. although it kills me inside..

then.. i talk to a friend of mine about my dissatisfaction towards him.. about relationships, regain self identity and getting into deep trouble.. we have talked about it.. although not thoroughly.. but just to make the murky situation more clearer.. and it did.. now we are better.. and let just hope no more things like this would happen again..

i realised how i have changed.. i am not the same person i used to be.. please accept the new me.. just like how i accepting my new self..

*relieved*