Sunday, September 27, 2009

Goodbye my love..

Looking at the title.. you guys could tell what is this post will be all about.. saying one of the hardest word to say.. Goodbye.. I hate the word because all it can give me is nothing but a feeling of your heart just got crushed into a thousand pieces.. tears start streaming down.. breathing gets harder and you feel suffocated in your own emotion.. especially when you say this to someone so dear to you before.. I don’t want to say this but I have too.. *** has made his choice to go oversea to continue his studies.. although we are nothing more than just a friend.. but.. it is still hurts badly.. maybe my love for him is still there.. I will never forget him.. he’s my comfort.. he was always there when im alone.. then, we went through a relationship that doesn’t last for long.. but the love never dies, I could never hate him.. and now, looking at him and his family at the airport.. there’s nothing much to say but all I could do was cry.. although he tried to comfort me like he usually does.. I cant stop crying.. and I don’t really care what other people think about me.. I cant stop myself.. I love him.. and that’s a fact.. while his parents looked at both of us.. with a very inquisitive look.. they kept quiet.. maybe they understand what was happening or they have no clue at all..he was trying his best to control his tears from flowing down.. I could see that.. but, he’s a man.. we hugged each other for more than 5 minutes when the calling for the flight was being announced.. he whispered me words of love and I .. I cant do anything but just cry.. then, when I could get a grip of myself.. I let go of him and say to him..

“ Goodbye my love.. find someone new there.. someone better than who I am.. forget about our love because it might cause you unhappiness.. just remember the good memories.. forget all the fights and cold treatment that we used to give to each other.. just remember one thing.. I love you and always will.. though we are not together but you will always have a place in my heart.. move on with your life okie.. im just a memory”

Then, I let him go fully.. he held my hand and grip it hard.. he then lean forward and give me one last kiss.. on my forehead.. but I could feel tears trickling on my skin as he kisses me.. and his heart pounded so hard until it was visible and audible.. then, he let me go of his embrace and lift his luggage and walked to his family to check in for the flight.. as he went down.. I looked at him and he looked back at me.. and then we hide our faces.. no more tears please.. I have cried enough.. then, I went home.. with his memory embedded in my mind..
Goodbye my love..

*moved on*

(Written on 24th Sept 2009)