Friday, January 22, 2010

Gosh, stop thinking about it okie..

Seriously, although it has been almost a year.. but I still cant forget about that person.. about what he had done in my life.. making me feel horrible most of the time.. keep me questioning a lot about myself and what will happen.. not answering my questions.. make me fight with my besties.. cause me to look like a fool.. and a lot more about what he had made my life into.. a big mess.. seriously.. I don’t know why but I just cant stop thinking about him.. damn you..

Sometimes I wonder by myself, why did I ever fall for you before?.. the only nice thing about you was your look.. and it stops there.. your behavior was rather obnoxious.. you seriously don’t have a way with words.. and when you’re mad, you’re the scariest thing on earth.. and yet, I still fall for you.. even my friends asked me back then and somehow up till now, what made me fall for you?.. I have no answer for it until now.. maybe till eternity..

So, I might fall for you when you’re sick.. because that is just me.. if I could love and like someone if that person is sick.. that means I really love the person.. and this happened to you.. but you were my friend from before.. so, I dare not go so far.. yet, I braved myself to face you and pour my heart out.. and even show my affection towards you.. and what did you give in return?? And unexplainable gesture of a feeling that I could not decipher.. and when I asked you about us.. you just shut your mouth and say nothing.. and that helps to create nothing but more and more hatred on you..

Now, I cant even bare the slightest memory of you.. even a picture or memory.. because it gonna drive me mad.. of anger.. and resentment.. sometimes I wished you were never a part of my life before.. I hope all those memory could be erased completely from my mind.. and I could live happily.. yeah, you may say it is my fault for not moving on.. but I have moved on.. only the hatred remained.. hope someday I will find a way to forgive you and get you out of my head..

*hate it to the limit*

2 comments:

aj_hadzmy said...

yeah i know of the feeling of wanting to erase anything u dont wanna remember.

Sysco said...

i hate him although it has been a year.. what did go wrong with me?? annoyed by my own emotion.. haish..