i am on a break. with that particular someone. let call the person Perth. okie, called the person S before but Perth have more impact in me. just because i could not handle burden of relationship and studies at the same time. besides, the distance is killing me too. although not that bad for the person. seriously, without the presence, i tend to forget. i forget about the whole thing. i start looking at others. and i start falling at others. but, i am still very much attached to the person. hence the feeling of guilt and all. seriously, i feel so wrong with every liking.
i tell Perth everything. i tell about emotional and life matters too. and seriously, i tell Perth about Tower and Perth is okie with it. but i am the one feeling so wrong, since i think my feeling is changing. seriously, i am putting Tower before Perth but Perth is the one i am with. i even imagine myself with Tower than with Perth. whatta? as usual, i am chasing the impossible and trying to leave what i have in hand right now.
Perth, i am so sorry. i think i could not commit to this relationship if my mind keep on thinking about someone outside it. seriously, the love? i have nothing to say since i am uncertain about every aspect in it. yes, you have comforted me by saying you are not affected at all by all the feeling i have for Tower but still, i am the one facing it. and i dont know for how long will this last. i have made you wait before, it will be cruel if i do this again. seriously, i dont want to toy with your feeling anymore. Please, this time i will let you make the decision. i will accept it no matter what.
*urghh*
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